Rejection 126

I should know by now: You ask for something, you get it.  Last night I sent out a round of emails checking up on submission from July through September I hadn't heard from.  Sure enough, I received an email today saying that Harp & Altar had put my story in the wrong file, so it was good I checked up.  He read it, and though he liked "some of the writing," he didn't take to it.

Hopefully a few more rejections will roll in, in the next 24 hours or so, for my blogging pleasure.  I have a feeling from looking at websites though, that a few places have been napping for a while now, if they haven't gone into permanent hibernation.

RIP those those don't respond.

Rejection 125

Form rejection email from NANO Fiction.

Chapbook Sold Out

Thank you to all the wonderful people who bought the January trio of chapbooks from ml Press.  They are officially sold out.  I can show my face at the plethora of January readings in Chicago I plan on attending.  Here are the ones I am really excited about: Friday, January 9 @ 7PM.  THE DOLLAR STORE at the Hideout. Featuring Lindsay Hunter, Robbie Q. Telfer & The Brothers Dodson.

Sunday, January 11th @ 7 PM.  MYOPIC POETRY SERIES at Myopic Books. Featuring Erin Teegarden, Liz Marino & Dan Godston.

Tuesday, January 13th @ 7:30 PM. QUICKIES! at The Innertown Pub. Featuring Jonathan Messinger, Tim Kinsella, Chad Chmielowicz, Steve Tartaglione  & Rory Jobst.

Sunday, January 18th @ 7 PM.  ORANGE ALERT READING SERIES at The Whistler. Featuring Chris Bower, Jill Summers, Nick Ostdick & Scott Stealey.

Tuesday, January 20th @ 6:30 PM.  REC ROOM at the MCA as a part of the Literary Gangs of Chicago Reading Series.  Featuring Allison Gruber, Carl Marcum, M, Eliza Hamilton Abegunde, Eric Ehlstain, Erin Teegarden, Mary Hamilton, Jason Bredle, Krista Franklin, Miki Howald, Kyle Beachy, Nicolette Bond, Matthias Regan, Pat Babbitt & Lindsey Fisher.

Thursday, January 29th @7:30 PM.  WOMEN & CHILDREN FIRST.  Featuring Kathleen Rooney with her books Live Nude Girl: My Life As an Object and Lindsay Hunter.

So screw the snow and turn in your homebody card like I did.  Buy a drink too many and take a cab home like you won't regret it in the morning.

And the Winner is...

Sean Lovelace. I am quite happy to announce that the winner of the Rose Metal Press Chapbook Contest, for which I was one of five finalists, is the dear Sean Lovelace. I won't say he is the only person I am happy to lose to, but he is one of a very small number I am glad to celebrate in place of myself.

Congratulations, Sean! Keep an eye on their website for when it goes on sale: Rose Metal Press. You know it's gonna be good.

Addendum to Post:

I was a little excited, and failed to explain that the title of Sean's chapbook is How Some People Like Their Eggs, which would sort of explain the picture above.

Also, I want to take a second to acknowledge all of the other finalists:

Aaron Burch for Birthmarks Stefanie Freele for Breathing Oysters Molly Gaudry for Come See the Monkey & Other Stories Moi for This Stranger She'd Invited In Erika Mikkalo for 26 Letters

And semi-finalists:

Lisa Buchanan for Artifacts from the American Century Dawn Corrigan for Under the Power Lines Roseanne Griffeth for Getting There Eventually Tiff Holland for Straight Out of the Can Kate McCorkle for The Last Parakeet and Other Stories

Rejection 124

I have received another very kind and encouraging rejection from Hobart. Aaron Burch did not find the story to have the precision he likes in short shorts though.

Glad I got one last one in before the New Year.

Hear Ye! Hear Ye!

My chapbook, A HEAVEN GONE,  is up for sale now at ML Press, as is SOME OF THE LETTERS THAT WERE CUT, BUT THAT TELL EVEN MORE OF THE STORY OF JONATHON BENDER, WEATHERMAN (b. 1967-d.1999) by Michael Kimball, and LIKE IT WAS HER PLACE by Kim Chinquee. I'm peeing my pants right now I'm so excited to have work for sale alongside these two writers.

P.S. Please go buy them.  I will be really embarrassed if mine is the only ML Press Chapbook that never sells out.

Rejection 123

Time for the rejections to start again. Who's ready? The person to break the dry spell was a rather flustered Adam Robinson of the "Is Reads" project, explaining that he kept trying not to reject my poems, for a number of reasons, but ultimately, they were too long. THEN, he talked about two of the poems I'd sent him and gave good feedback. He said the first part of one of my poems was hokey and the last part was inventive, and then he asked where "the twain will meet?" I thought that was pretty great.

And then he said I should send him work that was more like 10 lines long really soon. Yessir. This was a good one. It wins "Rejection of the Week."

The last time I declared a "Rejection of the Week" I said it was not a new feature, but I've changed my mind. "Rejection of the Week" will be declared whenever I enjoy a rejection a whole lot. This may be once a month or it might be twice in one day. It's just another way of saying, "I love you."

Happy Holidays!

Since everyone who has the power to reject me is seemingly busy being merry and tolerant of family and friends, I will take a moment to wish a big, old, "Thank you!" and, also, "Happy Holidays!" to all of the good people who took the time to read my work this year, whether they be acceptors, rejectors, or just plain readers. You certainly don't need to spend your time or money supporting independent literary ventures, but it sure is nice that you do. Thank you also to the people who google such phrases as "douche bag," "douchebag," "French maid," and "human boner."  You make me smile when I see that your search arrived at my blog and raised my number of visits for the day.

If I knew any of you in person, I might scrape together my pennies and buy you one of the following items:

A Chia Pet

A Snuggie

Or, finally,

A ShamWow

I would decide which gift you would get on what I imagined you were most silently wishing for.  I know, I know.  You want all three, but I'm not made of money.

Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah! Happy Kwanzaa! Merry Solstice! Happy New Year!  Or, just, you know, try to have a good day for a change! Whatever turns you on!

Something New is Happening @ HeyShortyComeToMyKegPartyDouglasIsInABadMoodThereAreNachosRINGRINGRINGRINGRINGRINGRINGBANANAPHONEPenguinsOnWingsOfAirplanesEatingCloudsILove$

The full title of this new wunderkind is HeyShortyComeToMyKegPartyDouglasIsInABadMoodThereAreNachos

RINGRINGRINGRINGRINGRINGRINGBANANAPHONEPenguinsOnWings

OfAirplanesEatingCloudsILove$.

Its title kind of f'ed up this blog and my resume.

I don't think I really understand what it is, but I sure do like it. 16 word "stories" at a Twitter/blog/ mag thing. There are lots of stories about Rufio from Hook right now. Go here. You'll have fun. Promise.

Rejection 122

Cutbank has sent me a small rectangle of a rejection with edges so ragged, a dull pair of scissors was obviously cutting 10 sheets at a time.  If I ever win the lotto I will call a financial planner first and then the first thing I buy will be a fancy guillotine cutter for Cutbank.  Mark my words.