Usually I don't post when things are accepted. I usually only post when things are rejected or actually published. I am making an exception, because yesterday morning Dan Wickett from Dzanc called me at 8:30 to say they wanted to publish my novel in 2012.
I said, "Oh my god," 110 times.
I was half asleep, but at one point I thought he was saying that they knew 2 years was a long way away so if I wanted to publish it with someone else, I could. I was confused and said, "Why would I want to publish it with someone else? I like you guys." But then he repeated what he said and what he really said was that if I had another manuscript I didn't need to give them first crack at it. Ohhhhh. I get it. I said "Thank you" a bunch and then Dan said he was sorry that I wouldn't be able to put the rejection on my blog, and I assured him that disappointment could be dealt with. Instead I am cheating and writing about an acceptance! Ha!
Then we hung up and I proceeded to pee myself 111 times in concurrence. Then I went to the dentist to have a broken filling replaced. My dental hygienist said I could be the next Nora Roberts. I cheerily said, "Maybe!" because you have to pick and choose who you have these discussions with.
When she and the dentist asked what my novel was about, and I told them it was a about a man whose wife is missing and he doesn't know why, but he doesn't really try to figure out why, they said, "Like Drew Peterson?" and I said, with their fingers all in my mouth, "Ummmmm, sure."
Then I bought my parents a microwave for their anniversary and returned some library books.
Then I came home and made myself a sandwich and watched an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Then I ate ice cream. Then I passed out from the excitement for a little while. Then I woke up and called my grandmas. One of my grandmas said they would probably add this credit to my "file on the computer," by which I'm pretty sure she meant it might come up if you google me. I said, "Probably!"
Then I ate dinner with Mary and Bob Ross and Mrs. Bobo.
Then we went to the Hideout for The Dollar Store and everyone cracked my shit up. Whoa. That was an amazing reading. Mary read a story about a Teddy Bear #1 who loved getting a colonic and then the teddy bear did a cartwheel and I died of happiness. Also! We got to stand outside for a little while before we admitted it was too cold to be standing outside.
Then I went home and talked to my roommate for a while, before I passed out again.
That's how the day my book got accepted for publication went. Yes. Good one.